How to Stop Paying for Dates with Women

Published: 08th August 2006
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Okay... so, if you're like me and aren't anywhere near being rich, you probably don't want to pay for women on every date that you go on. Personally, at this point, I just don't have the money. Well, there's a solution to this problem...

Don't go on dates. Yes, that's right. I just told you not to go on dates. Even if you have the money to spend on dates, don't go on them. They are not only expensive, but they are completely counter productive if you want a relationship with a woman.

I can hear it now, "But, isn't the name of your book 'Date the Women of Your Dreams'? How can I date the women of my dreams if I don't go on dates?"

Honestly, it's because I like the name... and the URL was available. But, really, when I talk about "dating", I'm talking about going through the courtship process with a woman. I'm NOT talking about taking a girl out, spending lots of money on her and hoping to get a kiss at the end of the night.

If you try to buy a woman's affection, you might succeed(I know a few guys who use this technique regularly). However, you probably won't be in the type of relationship that you want.

When you try to buy a woman, show her how cool your car is, or do anything else that obviously shows that you're trying to impress her, you're basically telling her that you aren't good enough for her by yourself and that the rest of the relationship is going to be spent by you trying to continually win her affection with money and gifts.

This is the WRONG way to go. In the long run, you won't be happy, she won't be happy and you'll just be used and abused until she finally has enough of it and dumps you. If you have money or something impressive, let her find out from seeing it. And if she's not impressed by it, don't be surprised.

Eventually, when you get good at the principles that I teach, you'll have women buying you dinners, taking you out, and treating you to a good time like I do. But, that's a another story.

We have a norm in our society that says when you take a girl out, you have to pay. And if you take a girl out, expect to pay. Really...

There's a big difference between being "cheap" and not having any money. Thank goodness women are attracted to men for their character and not their just their money or I'd be shit out of luck.

If you're taking a woman out and expecting her to pay even though it was all your idea, she didn't offer to pay, and you took her out, you're going to look like a cheap bastard. And, most importantly, you're going to make the situation extremely awkward.

Okay, I'm not saying that there's anything wrong with being conscious about your money. If we all just went around spending and not saving anything, we'd all be in debt. You just don't want women to know that you're as cheap as you are... its better to have her think you just don't have any money.

Now, if you come across as just not having any money, that won't be a big deal unless you're with a gold digger and she probably won't be with you at this point anyway(or not for long if you play your cards right). Also, don't take a woman out somewhere that you guys have to pay money for if you don't have the money... that's just silly.

So, how do you "date" girls if you aren't taking them out to dinners Christian?

I'm glad you asked.

There are actually a lot of different ways to approach this. The frame that you want to have though is, "We're just going to hang out because you seem cool and if something happens, something happens."

You're not going on a "date" at any point. If she mentions going on a date with you, dating you, or anything anywhere similar to any of these, make it known that you are not looking to date but that you think she is cool and want to hang out. If something happens, it happens, if it doesn't, it doesn't. Then accuse her of coming on to you too early.

I like to go to social events. My favorite is swing dancing. It's a laid back environment where you can just have a good time with her and build the connection between the two of you. Also, there are a TON of creepy guys there so your contrast to them makes you seem like an even cooler guy that you are. Just have her meet you there and she'll pay herself to get in. And, even if you bring her, it hardly costs anything to swing dance.

And, swing dancing isn't the only thing that you can go do. If you really don't want to spend a dime, have her come along to something like going shopping for a present(for your sister... I know there's always a holiday coming up soon.) or for yourself, go walking in the park, go play some pool, riding bikes, to a carnival, art museum, climbing, whatever.

The point is, you can go do a lot of things. And, I've found that most things that you can go do will probably cost a lot less than going to dinner or a movie and will probably be a lot more interesting for her. Why would she want to go to dinner anyway? Do you know how many guys have probably taken her out to dinner before? Go do something fun and enjoy the time you have.

Another thing to think about is that some women like to pay for things. They feel badly if they don't pay for their half.

Allow them to do so. A lot of girls will feel awkward if you're paying for everything and that's the last thing you need.

If you're using all my techniques and principles the right way, it won't matter whether you're driving her around in a Mercedes or you're taking her around in on an electronic scooter... she'll love you for it.

You see, I've tried everything imaginable with women. Most of the stuff that I've tried out didn't work. That's right... it sucked a big one.

But, through all of the trial and error, testing and retesting, I've developed systems that actually do work... and they work quite well indeed.

You can save yourself days, weeks, months and years of doing things that didn't work by just following the instructions that I give you in my books.

Christian Doyles teaches men all across the world how to meet and date women. He offers books, audio programs, seminars and workshops where he takes people into social venues and teaches them how to meet women live. Visit his site at and download a free sample of his book as well as get other great information about women and dating that will cut years off of your learning process.

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